Return of the Jedi

23 Nov

n update after my little Jedi’s unfortunate experience from the other day.

Today we found ourselves in the same area of Disneyland when it came time for lunch. Wouldn’t you know, just as we managed to find a table and get the kids all settled down the Star Wars music pipes up and the Jedi Training Academy started up again in full. My boy says to me “Daddy, I want to go watch the Jedi Training Academy”. My wife and I both give each other “the look”.

“Are you sure?” we both asked him at the same time. “Darth Maul is going to be there.”

“Yes, I want to” was his firm reply.

So I put my little Padawan on my shoulders and walked him over to a better viewing position in the audience. I asked him at least three more times if he was sure he wanted to watch the show. “Yes, I want to” he repeated every time. The same script as before. The same actors. The Stormtroopers come out. Darth Vader comes out. Then Darth Maul comes out. Darth Maul does his kung-fu (Taras Kasi for all you Star Wars nerds out there) and prowls around the audience with his menacing scowl once again. Wouldn’t you know it. Darth Maul winds up 12 inches away, face-to-face with my son again, just two days after utterly destroying my poor boy with his creepy yellow contact lenses and prosthetic sharp, pointy teeth. He lingered, playing it up to the tender little 3-year-old sitting on top of my shoulders.

From across the crowd my wife and I lock eyes, both of us panic-stricken, convinced we’d just carved the soul out of our son twice in the same week. From atop my shoulders I felt my son’s legs flex, I saw his little fist shake an inch or two in front of the bill of my cap, and I heard his little 3-year-old voice say with every ounce of fire he could muster:


The Sith warrior skulked away and back into the Jedi Training Academy script.

When it was all over my boy said to me, “I did it, Daddy! I did it! I wasn’t afraid of Darth Maul!”

Here’s to my little Jedi, getting back on the horse (or on the Bantha as it were). The Force is strong with you. Pass on what you have learned.

-Dork Dad

2 Responses to “Return of the Jedi”


  1. Cautionary Tale « - November 24, 2011

    […] For an account of the rematch between Darth Maul and my son just two days later, check out this link. GA_googleAddAttr("AdOpt", "1"); GA_googleAddAttr("Origin", "other"); […]

  2. When To Expose Your Kids To Star Wars – A White Paper « - February 14, 2013

    […] My wife and I had the conversation early. We agreed that we would wait until the kids were 6 before showing them the movies. I’m sad to say in a moment of weakness last year I broke the covenant of trust with my wife and showed the original movie to my then 3 ½ year old son. It was an awesome father/son day – totally a net-positive for him. But I got lucky. As young as he was, he missed a lot of the details. To this day when conversation turns to how Darth Vader was trying to kill his own son, my sensitive boy chokes up and says holding back tears “I don’t want to talk about that, Daddy.” With my eldest I did manage to wait until she was 6, showing her the entire trilogy in 10 minute intervals during bedtime snuggles. I have to say that was ideal. Everything about that experience felt right. She was the perfect age for all of it, and the experience for both of us was amazing. Those are two success stories, but I also have some experience with ultimate failure, when I exposed my son to certain Star Wars elements before he was ready. Worst. Parenting. Day. Ever. (Read about it here: part 1, part 2). […]

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